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 Unwanted Erection
 Family with teenage boy thinking about joining
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Deucer
New Member

Posted - 06/08/2009 :  08:22:49 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
My wife and I are both 39 with 13yo boy and 11yo girl. We are interested in joining a local nudist resort but are somewhat worried about their ages and thoughts.

I frequented nude beaches, bare bun fun runs, clothing optional hot springs and swims on my own from 18-22, when I met my soon to be wife. She was raised very conservatively. At 24 I talked her going to a couple places, and she was surprised to like it. At 25 we had our boy and we both got too busy to go. At 31 9/11 happened and we decided to enjoy life. We went to hot springs on own and enjoyed it still. So we have taken the kids twice a summer since then. At their ages they jet followed parents. But where we go is quiet, it has often been just family for some of the time. When others are there, everything has gone smoothly. Kids love it and dont even think of it as odd, they are below the water much of tye time. This summer they will be older - 13 boy and 11 girl. By
only do we plan to go to hot springs this summer, wife and I are talking about jointing a club just she and I go to once a year together. She is worried our boy will feel strange and get erections. I told her that nudists don't get erections because naturism is not about sex. I have never seen an erection at a nudist place. Of course I don't go often. I have been doing some research, not much, and have read that erections do in fAct occur quite routinely. I would like to know if this is in fact true. Young boys? Teens? Men? I can in understand in teens but I never even got close to one so I am surprised even disappinted. I liked how innocent the places seem. Again I told the wife that they don't happen and she has no reason to think I'm wrong since she never saw one while there. By the way I am worried that our boy might be susseptable to erections sine last summer he got one at the hot springs for the first time. He wispered it to me when I asked him to help me start lunch so I let him stay in water until it went away. I never told my wife. I just figured it may have been the warm water creating the erection as that has happened to me, but at my age, I can control it better. It may have instead been the older teenagers in the next pool over.

So I guess what I am asking long windedly is what are the chances a 13yo will get an erection in public? A 39yo? What's the best way to ask them to join mom and dad in this lifestyle, or do we just drag them there whether they like it fully or not and say it's an adult decision, kids don't vote? Will it be more difficult on tye girl than the boy? Thanks! Any suggestions are apreciated!

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McNigel
Forum Member


Posted - 06/10/2009 :  04:02:26 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Tricky one.
Generally boys of that age wouldn't be seen in anything less than huge baggy shorts. Mostly children of that age tend to cover up on nudist beaches. I don't know about clubs.

It is likely that a boy of that age would get more uncontrollable erections than could be discreetly hidden. The first problem is that he will die of embarrassment. The second is the attitude of others. Most people would just laugh it off as the perils of ragging hormones, but there might be some who object.

If he hasn't been frightened off yet, I'd explain that you understand and so will other people, if he isn't too brazen. Some times he might have to cover up.
As for the girl tell her it happens to boys and not to poke fun or laugh.

Our little kiddies are now 25 and 22. Ours is very much a clothing optional household. The boy is now shocked by this, the girl is more 'get a load of me!' They'll grow up.



Edited by - McNigel on 06/10/2009 04:07:00 AM

Country: United Kingdom | Posts: 132 Go to Top of Page

Balto Bob
$ Supporter


Posted - 06/10/2009 :  04:25:31 AM  Show Profile  Visit Balto Bob's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Don't worry too much about this. I would discuss this as a family. The 13 y.o. will get erections now and then. Part of life at his age. If he spends time at home nude chances are you have seen them. The 11 y.o. girl will need to deal with different issues. I remember talking my oldest into using tampons. We had a backyard pool. She was annoyed one day because she got her period (her mother wasn't home). I told her the instuctions were in the box. 30 mins later she was in the pool. Do you spend much time nude at home? Everyone should be comfortable being nude togeather before adding others. I would take the kids to the club for a day or weekend before you join. That would be a good idea if you were joining any club, nude or not. Good luck!!


Bob
Have a nice NUDE day !!

www.flickr.com/photos/isisdc/2560300492/
www.flickr.com/photos/perspective/2560521247/



Country: USA | Posts: 830 Go to Top of Page

Nudejoe
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Posted - 06/30/2009 :  08:08:00 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
At that age, boys are still very much under the influence of their hormones. Erections will happen from time to time and you need to tell him that this is natural and that it might happen from time to time. You might wish to ask him to keep a towel with him so that he can cover up if it makes him feel uncomfortable or he can use the towel to lie down on his stomach and have him think of things like sports, math, favorite video games, etc so that his mind focuses on those areas and eventually after about a minute or so, he will be back in a more relaxed state.


Country: USA | Posts: 19 Go to Top of Page

KristyM
New Member

Posted - 07/07/2009 :  07:33:31 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I'll answer two things for you:

1.) Don't force the kids and tell them it's an adult decision. They're young and they're both at that "impressionable" age where their bodies are changing and their hormones are kicking, and if they've never done anything like this before and you suddenly tell them, without asking for their thoughts or giving them any say in the matter, that the whole family is going to spend a week naked with strangers, it could scare the crap out of them. Bring it up, educate them a bit, see what they think, but don't force them.

2.) Erections happen, especially for teenage boys. Women understand that. If (when) it happens, be discreet. Hop in the pool if you're near one. Lie face down if you're sunbathing on a towel. Just cover up discreetly with your hands for a few moments if you have no other option. No one will be offended by an inadvertent erection unless you're strutting around showing it off, and that doesn't seem likely for you or your 13-year-old son.



Country: USA | Posts: 5 Go to Top of Page

KristyM
New Member

Posted - 07/07/2009 :  08:30:55 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I will add a funny story for you and for your son that might put his mind at ease. I used to go to a naturist resort each summer with my cousin and my aunt and uncle. This was from age 12 to 18 or so, in the early and mid 1990s. My aunt used to take a few photos each summer of the family and our friends.

Last year my cousin, who is 35 now, found an old picture that she had never seen before. A picture of the two of us together, when I was 13 and she was 17. We are posing with one of my best friends from our trips to the resort, a boy named Stephen who was a year older than me. He's in the middle, and Jodi and I are on either side, and we've got our arms around each other and everyone is smiling and no one is wearing anything but sandals.

Jodi found this photo and thought it was such a nice picture, we all looked happy, and at first she couldn't figure out why she'd never seen it with the other family photos. Then she realized ... Stephen had an erection. Apparently her mom didn't want to include it with the other pictures because of that. But Jodi thought it was hilarious, and she couldn't wait to show it to me. This young boy, his arms around two young girls, all of them naked, and he's got an erection and a big old smile on his face. Cracked us up.

But the point? It was completely innocent. There was nothing lustful or inappropriate about it, and at the time we didn't even notice it, so he must have covered up or done something about it pretty quickly. Tell your son that it's no big deal unless he makes it a big deal. It's natural.



Country: USA | Posts: 5 Go to Top of Page

Ronps
Forum Member


Posted - 07/07/2009 :  12:17:12 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Bravo Kristy M....and thanks for emphasizing that an erection is natural. When I was 13, I was at a camp and had an erection for no reason. I was told by an uncle, that only a pervert gets hard at a camp. I never said anything to my parents and kept the comment to myself. Most of you can imagine what a scar this has left.


Country: USA | Posts: 24 Go to Top of Page

Randall50
Forum Member


Posted - 08/12/2009 :  1:51:41 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
My teenage children (daughter and son) did not really want to be with me no matter where I took them. They are in their 20's today and we have a great relationship. I always stressed that everyone has a private life -a need for a private life - and nudism is part of that choice. As a young man, it would have been pretty difficult to discreetly manage an erection in public. All men know that teenage boys have erections without notice and repeatedly. (What's the point of joining a social nudist club when one is constantly trying to manage an erection? LOL)


Country: USA | Posts: 117 Go to Top of Page

sailawaybob
Forum Member


Posted - 08/12/2009 :  10:45:32 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
my two boys were raised as nudist from almost infants till they turned teens, they enjoyed going to the nudist resorts and swimming and playing with their friends but when they became teens they along with the other teens started to disappear, i don't believe it was the hangup about being nude but because they were teens and now had other interest. you will have a better chance with the eleven year old than the thirteen year old, but i wouldn't worry about the erections as most kids are playing and having fun i think some may have a erection and don't even notice. but i would give him and her the opportunity to go.


Country: USA | Posts: 1268 Go to Top of Page

nudeguy
Forum Member


Posted - 09/12/2009 :  3:12:50 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Deucer

I have been doing some research, not much, and have read that erections do in fAct occur quite routinely. I would like to know if this is in fact true. Young boys? Teens? Men? I can in understand in teens but I never even got close to one so I am surprised even disappinted. I liked how innocent the places seem. Again I told the wife that they don't happen and she has no reason to think I'm wrong since she never saw one while there. By the way I am worried that our boy might be susseptable to erections sine last summer he got one at the hot springs for the first time. He wispered it to me when I asked him to help me start lunch so I let him stay in water until it went away. I never told my wife. I just figured it may have been the warm water creating the erection as that has happened to me, but at my age, I can control it better. It may have instead been the older teenagers in the next pool over.

So I guess what I am asking long windedly is what are the chances a 13yo will get an erection in public?

Duecer, teenage boys get spontaneous erections very often and anywhere they happen to be. Showing up nude in public where there also happens to be warm water, a nice breeze, and naked females romping about is going to make your son's arousal significantly more likely. I recommend that you refrain from insisting to your wife that erections don't occur at nudist venues, particularly among teenagers, because that statement is way off the mark.

You commented that you didn't mention anything to your wife about your son's erection in the water ("I never told my wife.") The boy is very likely able to sense your need for secrecy in this matter and that fact alone will make him uneasy about it, or even ashamed.

The next time he gets an erection in your presence, be casual about it. Tell him it's part of life, there's nothing wrong with having one, he's a totally normal boy and there is no need to be embarassed. But do emphasize the need to behave appropriately if (when) it happens around others, by not waving it around like a big flag and to just ignore it if he can't readily hide it. Not bringing others' attention to it is the best course of action. If someone does notice, he should stay cool as if nothing is going on.

And as one poster already suggested, make sure your daughter does not make fun of him if (when) she sees him with an erection. Thirteen year old boys can be very sensitive about those comments.

I also advise having a talk with "the wife" and admit the information you gave her is not entirely correct. She will almost surely spot your son with an erection one day at the resort. She needs to know he's having them, and providing correct information on the topic will lessen her shock and embarassment. If your wife knows how likely and normal erections are for a young teenage boy, she can take it in stride when it does occur and not make your son feel bad about an uncontrollable body function.

This discussion reminds me of something Jay Leno said during a monologue a few years back. He mentioned a news report about teenagers experimenting with Viagra to get high. He concluded with, "Viagra??? At that age, kids ARE Viagra!"



Country: USA | Posts: 126 Go to Top of Page

blavan
Forum Member

Posted - 09/17/2010 :  4:11:29 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Yes, he will get erections because he is a teenage boy, and his hormones are raging. It is normal, so he should be informed that it is normal, and that it is nothing to be worried about.
His having an erection can be a teachable moment for you the parents to continue the process of showing him how to be a gentleman, and not behave in a manner that would cause anyone to feel uncomfortable. Erections come and erections also eventually always go away. You can help him through this, and not deny the whole family the experience of visiting nudists resorts together.
We frequent a family nudist resort where there are many children of all ages including teenage boys. We have never observed a problem, and we have seen some erections managed very well.

Being Naked and Being Real



Country: | Posts: 146 Go to Top of Page

SyncVA
Forum Member

Posted - 10/01/2010 :  12:52:00 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Of course he will get erections! He's going through puberty! I'd talk to him openly and honestly about it. Good suggestions above about managing it in a gentlemanly manner and suggesting his sister not tease him about it. She'll get used to it, soon enough, as will he.

Remember, most people in naturist environments have probably encountered a spontaneous erection before, and should be familiar with how easily they can occur during puberty... If he acts with some maturity about it, he'll learn to shrug it off (or even joke about it) soon enough. "What can I say? Puberty."



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outdoorfun1
Forum Member

Posted - 03/20/2013 :  08:20:06 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I agree with the above, when our nephew first joined us, it was a bit difficult for him in the beginning, being a teenage boy. He would also have spontaneous erections around my wife and daughter, luckily my wife is very calm about things like that, we all had a very mature chat about it and that put him at ease. He does have them every now still, it is part of life, the big thing is not to make a fuss about it. As I told him, if it happens, don't draw attention to it, it will gradually subside and another plus point is that it still functions like it should.


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allnaturalwife
Forum Member

Posted - 03/21/2013 :  5:39:30 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
If this is a legitimate post I have several issues with the poster:
1. If you are so "pro nudity" why have you exposed your children to it so infrequently?
2. You were "too busy" to go to nudist venues? Also too busy to be nude in your own home?
3. Why do you treat nudism as something you "DO" as opposed to something you "ARE"
4.You are worried about your 13 year old boy getting an erection? Maybe if he was around nudity from age 0 to 13...he might be more used to it.

These are some of the pertinent questions I always ask when I see anyone post about introducing pre-teens and/or teens to nudism. I just feel its an odd time to "get into a completely new way of life" Or if you view nudism as an "activity" then it is an even worse time to "try' it with kids at that age.

I feel VERY strongly about this issue. Your children have already been around for 10-13 years and you haven't made them comfortable with nudity, you have dropped the ball already. Not saying it is impossible to introduce a teenager to nudism, but again if it is important to you as a parent that your children be comfortable with nudity..why didn't you start that from day 1??

Jenn, proud mother of three grown daughters who live their lives as nudists, and will pass on this way of life to their current/future children:)



Country: USA | Posts: 689 Go to Top of Page

JCP
Forum Member


Posted - 06/19/2013 :  6:51:43 PM  Show Profile  Visit JCP's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Hi, I am researching a novel that has adolescent boys as the main characters and naturism as a theme.

Did you come to any conclusion?

Did your wife accept a revised acceptance of adolescent sexual development?

If you went ahead did your son cope?

Is it worth writing a novel about the subject, will it help adolescents and parents to cope with the realities?

I'm also looking for readers to offer constructive criticism, fancy a preview?

I welcome responses from anybody with a constructive opinion - please feel free to use my email.

All the best JCP



Country: United Kingdom | Posts: 57 Go to Top of Page

sailawaybob
Forum Member


Posted - 06/19/2013 :  7:52:30 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
JCP there are a million book written on nudism - check out amazon , to a lot of people nudism is a fad someting to do, same with kids who are raised in a nudist enviroment some will stay with it as they grow into adulthood but i think more will leave, move on to new interest. my two kids moved on one won't talk about it and one will bring it up occasionally but has no interest in it anymore.


Country: USA | Posts: 1268 Go to Top of Page
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