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bzzlzz
New Member
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 Posted - 12/10/2007 : 08:58:41 AM
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Over the summer I found myself in a situation that challenged some of my ideas over etiquette and I wanted to present it to the group for thoughts
In July a group of friends and I chartered a Catalina to do some sailing off the coast of the Outer Banks. On board were myself and five other friends I had met through my travel club. The group was coed (three guys and two girls) and at the time no one knew each other very well, but we all wanted to do some sailing and we figured going as a group would be a good way to cut down on costs and get to know each other. The weather was perfect that day, and the wind strong. A little while after we got out of harbor and set a course we all disrobed started to unwind, relaxing on the deck and chit chatting. A few hours later we were moving at a good clip and I found myself at the helm. Mark, who I just recently met, was down in the galley cleaning up after lunch and everyone else was on the fore deck looking for dolphins who had been reported in the area. After finishing up down below Mark came out and stood on the back of the stern facing aft (basically, he was at the very back of the boat looking behind us, for those not familiar with nautical terms) a few moments later I turned around to find Mark urinating off of the back of the boat. The sight took me by surprise but I tried not to look too shocked, he clearly didn't seem to think it was a big deal. A few minutes later after we had been chatting for a while I carefully suggested that perhaps shouldn't do something like that again, especially in a coed situation. He apologized for offending me, but he explained that he really didn't feel like it was a big deal under the circumstances. He told me that he figured since he was easily able to get all of his urine into the sea, sanitation or smell wouldn't be an issue and that the sight of him urinating nude was almost exactly the same as him simply standing nude so it shouldn't bother anyone.
I told him that it was still something he should refrain from doing in public regardless of the context. He agreed that in most circumstances, nude or not, going number one or number two should be done in private, but that there really shouldn't be an issue in this particular situation. He did however promise me that he would not urinate like that again. The issue never came up again, and to my knowledge no one else on board witnessed the scene. The rest of the trip was a blast, but this particular episode stayed with me.
What would you have done in this situation? What else could I have said to persuade Mark against this behavior, or do you perhaps agree with him? Let me know.
Thanks,
bzzlzz
Notice: This moderator, operating under username 'Moderator', has been terminated for repeatedly censoring or altering posts without providing a clear indication of which policy was being enforced. Her actions were not sanctioned by this organization.
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Edited by - Moderator on 12/10/2007 09:40:27 AM
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 09:41:59 AM
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It was totally rude for him to do that. He should have gone below to the head or asked if the boat could stop and he would jump into the water.
He was lucky that the wind was going with the boat. Had it been against him, he would have gotten wet.
Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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Pete Knight
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 10:48:31 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Cheri
He was lucky that the wind was going with the boat. Had it been against him, he would have gotten wet.
Yes, he would have got his own back if he'd been facing into the wind!
Pete Knight
Reason for edit: Smelling mistake.
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Edited by - Pete Knight on 12/10/2007 10:50:28 AM |
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melissastarr
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 11:17:57 AM
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I agree with Cheri- that's nasty. I know we all have to go sometime, but we're not wild animals!
Melissa
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"Be who you are and say how you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter" -Dr. Seuss
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whitey100
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 11:50:53 AM
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I guess it simply depends upon the location and attitudes of those around.
In the mid-sixties, Mrs. Whitey and I took a ten week trip around the country and visited over twenty different nudist resorts. Three of those resorts (in CA, TX, and FL) had co-ed bathrooms. All told me that it had been a decision made by the members themselves, claiming that they had saved much money avoiding duplication of facilities.
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Edited by - whitey100 on 12/10/2007 11:52:14 AM |
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Diger
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 1:11:22 PM
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If it had not been coed and you had known that it would not have offened anyone else, it would have been OK. I have done the same thing with textile friends while fishing. In your friends defence he was out of sight of the ladies, and that is a country boy habit. LOL (I say that in love cause I'm a redneck too.) However I do agree in a coed setting it should be done in the water or the toilet.
Diger
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melissastarr
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 1:52:15 PM
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I dunno.... I just don't think I want anyone, male or female, peeing in front of me. It just seems bad etiquette. What would Dear Abby say?
Melissa
___________________________________________________________________
"Be who you are and say how you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter" -Dr. Seuss
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 2:01:41 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by whitey100
I guess it simply depends upon the location and attitudes of those around.
In the mid-sixties, Mrs. Whitey and I took a ten week trip around the country and visited over twenty different nudist resorts. Three of those resorts (in CA, TX, and FL) had co-ed bathrooms. All told me that it had been a decision made by the members themselves, claiming that they had saved much money avoiding duplication of facilities.
I don't mind co-ed bathrooms. What I do mind is someone urinating in public.
Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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GrayWolf
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 3:15:04 PM
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Not any more acceptable on a boat than it would be at a beach or resort. Which it isn't.
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Diger
Forum Member
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 3:39:51 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Diger
However I do agree in a coed setting it should be done in the water or the toilet.
Diger
I meant {by jumping in the water or the toilet.}
Diger
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jim19452
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 6:38:49 PM
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Ah, how mores change! Around the time of the American Revolution I've read it common at a gathering of mixed sex friends that a man would go to a cabinet take out a jar and urinate into it and then return to the friends. Beat the heck out of visiting an outhouse during mid-summer or mid-winter.
Best Wishes, Jim
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melissastarr
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 6:42:24 PM
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I have no problem with outhouses- I think they're kind of cute. And, before you ask, YES- I have used them before. My grandparents had a one-seater and a three-seater. But you'll notice that an outhouse has a door because it's proper etiquette not to urinate in front of others. Co-ed bathrooms still have doors on them. I've no problem with co-ed bathrooms. But let's at least pretend we're of greater moral stregth than the average dog. Even my cats won't urinate in front of me- they go in their box, which is covered all the way around!
Melissa
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"Be who you are and say how you feel because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter" -Dr. Seuss
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FireProf
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Posted - 12/10/2007 : 11:19:39 PM
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I would think that a boat that size, to accomodate 5 people, would have a head. He should have gone ahead and used the head.
There can be an argument that it would necessitate pumping out the holding tank but you'd have to anyway if any of the females chose to use it.
If you don't know people that well, why would you subject them to you urinating off the stern of a rented boat? We know our nudist friends very, very well and still wouldn't do this.
You were right and telling him what you thought of what he had done. No telling but he could have upset the rest of the guests and subsequent sailing outtings may not have happened or, if they did, may not have included him.
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Dave in Central Ky
Forum Member
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Posted - 12/11/2007 : 07:16:15 AM
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For several years my wife and I kept a pontoon boat on a river close to where we live. At times we would have as many as 10 or 12 people on it and it was common practice that if someone (male or female) had to pee you would tell everyone to face the opposite while you did your business off the side or the back of the boat and when you were finished you would tell everyone it was safe to turn around. This was pretty much the norm with all boaters on the river and no one thought anything about it.
But I agree, the fellow should not have cut loose without warning everyone first.
Dave
Cold Weather Sucks
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Edited by - Dave in Central Ky on 12/11/2007 07:21:18 AM |
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Fulldraw
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Posted - 12/11/2007 : 9:47:21 PM
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That shows no class! Very uncouth, rude and inconsiderate. What a moron.
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NTLnTAA
Forum Member
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Posted - 12/12/2007 : 05:58:24 AM
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What comes to mind is that beer commercial that plays during the football games. The one where the guy has several different ways to say *dude* just with voice inflection.
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Urinating etiquette?
