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Warmskin
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 Posted - 11/07/2013 : 4:51:21 PM
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It's awful to be a nudist and not be accepted by family and friends. Still, I manage to be a nudist without detection.
I'd like to live at a nudist resort, but that isn't going to happen. I'd have to rent an apartment in a nearby town, and use that as a front. I'd feel like private eye or something.
“I rise early almost every morning and sit in my chamber, without any clothes whatever, half an hour or an hour, according to the season, either reading or writing.”
Ben Franklin
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FireProf
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Posted - 11/07/2013 : 5:51:49 PM
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For me ... the most important people in our lives know and support how it is we live and what we do ... our girls, the one SIL, and our grandkids. They are the ones that count and everyone else ... well, it's there problem if they don't like what we do or who we are.
Having said that ... we have two circles of close friends; our nudist friends and our textile friends. Oddly enough, we're closer to our nudist friends and have only known them 1/2 as long. There's something to say about dropping your clothes and dropping your guard.
My wife's close textile friends probably know but they've never been told outright. My wife has tried a few times to tell them but each time she's tried ... seems one or more of the ladies has something more important for them to discuss and my wife shelves the discussion.
One of her friends moved back up toward us and was looking in the vicinity of Glen Eden Sun Club, our club. When she was telling us about a few homes they looked at, she said ... "we found one we liked but it was too close to the creepy nudie place." Having heard her take on "nudists", my wife decided not to say anything just then. As time has passed, my wife is still wanting to tell them about it but now feels that admitting that we go to the "creepy nudie place", it will make our friend feel bad and stupid. I don't care, my wife does and I understand that. I agree with my wife that ... "is telling them worth it and will it change anything we do? Most likely not." We will continue to be nudists, be members and go to the "creepy nudie place" and if they don't like it ... it's their problem.
We too have been toying with the idea of buying a place at Glen Eden but we'd need a condo for times when non nudist family members would visit. Our girls and grandkids would visit but probably not the rest of the family.
Loves being naked. Plays well with others!
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Nudony
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Posted - 11/10/2013 : 10:59:14 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by FireProf
My wife's close textile friends probably know but they've never been told outright. My wife has tried a few times to tell them but each time she's tried ... seems one or more of the ladies has something more important for them to discuss and my wife shelves the discussion.
The topic of "coming out" reminds me of some "altercations" I once had with someone in another forum... :)
Obviously, moving to a nudist resort like Marion Higgins (on my last post) or plastering your house with "Clothesfree Zone" signs are pretty evident and straightforward ways of "coming out." But ultimately, no matter how strong your nudist convictions are, the question IMHO is: "How important are your textile relationships to you?"
My best friend once told me this story about his fiancee's somewhat estranged sister. They went to visit her, aware of her "eccentric" behavior but unaware of the specifics of it. They arrived at her home; she greeted them in a bathrobe, my friend naturally assumed she'd just come out of the shower. What he didn't assume was that after greeting them and showing them their room, she would declare that she never wore clothes at home before proceeding to toss her bathrobe. My friend described a feeling of amazement and horror as she plopped in the couch in front of them completely naked. My friend and his fiancee decided to cut their stay short and left the next morning. The sister stayed nude the entire time.
For some people that sort of "coming out" may be admirable. The catch is that one effect of her particular style of committed nudism was ostracization - from her family and textile friends. A pretty high cost IMHO.
Ironically, in a way, my x did a similar "coming out" with her Mom. My MIL came over one day after work; my x was nude, and she just opened the door, letting her in before heading back to the kitchen and going about her business, remaining nude. However, there had been discussions about nudism, my MIL knew we'd been socially nude; she was ok with it. Even though this "coming out" might have seemed flamboyant, it was the result of discussions, and the agreement that clothes needn't be worn at home/in front of my MIL. So it was really a "selective coming out".
I would never begrudge someone "coming out selectively." Involving one's kids/granddkids in social/home nudism involves even more discretion since there are people who find the idea of being nude with one's children, around other nude adults and children - to be incomprehensible or even immoral.
In the documentary I linked, Marion Higgins actually talks about losing most of her textile friends after moving to Lake Como. If you're a loner, that may not be a big issue. If you have a large textile social network - probably a bigger issue.
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blavan
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Posted - 11/11/2013 : 09:03:06 AM
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Very well stated Nudony. It does depend on who you "come out" to and how it is done. We have lost some non-nudist friendships as a result of being outed, as in others were told of our nude lifestyle without our consent. We have since then selectively told many others, but we have controlled the "coming out", and that makes the outcome totally different and more acceptable to non-nudists. We choose to be clothed in the presence of our clothed friends, and that includes the ones who know that we are nudists.
Being Naked and Being Real
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ROB g
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Posted - 11/11/2013 : 12:42:19 PM
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Un supportiveness is a topic in many aspects of life and opinions. But staying with this one. I feel you can friends and family members who are not nudists that don't need to know if you know they are not accepting of it. My future sister inlaw knows and dose not care but we stay dressed when she is around. I could probably get away with being nude in front of her since she has expressed some interest and has talked to us about it. When I first met Kim. I told her I liked being nude and was every chance I got. She also said she like being nude. On our first date when we went back to her place to watch a movie she had me get naked. By our third or fourth date she was getting naked in front of me. and now were naked when ever we get a chance and are engaged. We only tell those who we know will not be offended. But we have also said we would like to meet nudists in our area. And feel we can have two sets of friends with out offending anyone.
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blavan
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Posted - 11/11/2013 : 3:41:07 PM
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We know lots of nudists that we have met at the nudist resort closest to us. Some of them are friends that we now see both at the resort and away from the resort. It's easy to meet and to get to know other nudists if the resort has an honestly friendly character. We have known our nudist friends for a while and we trust each other and feel safe with our nudist friends.
Being Naked and Being Real
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Warmskin
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Posted - 11/18/2013 : 01:25:43 AM
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That's good to hear, Blavan. That is how it should be.
“I rise early almost every morning and sit in my chamber, without any clothes whatever, half an hour or an hour, according to the season, either reading or writing.”
Ben Franklin
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Country: USA
| Posts: 1964 |
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Dealing with non-supportive friends and family
