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Curious in CT
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 Posted - 11/08/2003 : 4:03:02 PM
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I was just wondering if I could get peoples' opinions on a "Dear Abby" letter I read a while back. It was from a lady, who with her husband, had two other couples over for a cookout. When swimming in the pool was brought up, one of the couples said they only swim in the nude. Her husband and the third couple were game for swimming in the nude, but the wife wasn't. I may not have it exactly correct, but the general idea is right. Do you think she should've let everyone go swimming in the nude and just dealt with it, or was she right to say no?
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Country: USA
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panhandler
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Posted - 11/08/2003 : 4:16:56 PM
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It was her house, pool and cookout so what ever she says is right.
Panhandler
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Country: USA
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Cheri
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Posted - 11/08/2003 : 4:31:42 PM
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If it was my house, the hot tub has a NO CLOTHES rule. If we had a pool, I'm not sure what the rules would be since it's a much larger area. All clothes have a soap residua after washing no matter how many rinses. If someone were to get into a hot tub with what they perceived as a clean suit, there would still be a scummy residue on the surface, and we would have to dump the water and refil.
I believe the original answer from the columnist was that the home owner might consider having two events, one clothed, one not.
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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Country: USA
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panhandler
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Posted - 11/08/2003 : 8:22:47 PM
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Cheri if I read that right the wife that lives there was opposed to it. If so why would she have two events one clothed and one not?
panhandler
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Country: USA
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Spontanudity
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Posted - 11/08/2003 : 8:23:03 PM
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Why can't the other couples and husband swim nude and the wife remain in a swimsuit? I'm sure it wouldn't take long for the clothed partner to discover the freedom of swimming nude.
I think people fear being the odd-one-out rather than the act of being nude. At a nude beach the one person in a swimsuit gets gawked at more than the nude people.
Cheers,
Spontanudity
"Forever Naked"
http://groups.msn.com/YoungSydneyNaturists
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Country: Australia
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Cheri
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Posted - 11/08/2003 : 10:29:00 PM
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Panhandler, You may be right in your interpretation. It's her home, she does have the right to do as she pleases. Perhaps her husband should speak with her privately and ask if she wouldn't consider letting everyone skinny dip and she can stay clothed if she likes.
:) Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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Country: USA
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Kimberly
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Posted - 11/09/2003 : 03:04:53 AM
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I agree with you Cheri, no one should be forced to join a group. If the wife was uncomfortable in swimming nude, I do not see any reason while could not wear her suit.
Kim =^.^=
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Country: Canada
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Spontanudity
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/09/2003 : 07:47:57 AM
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Kim/Cheri,
What if the woman objects to seeing others nude? Surely she has the right to walk around her house without being "offended" by others nudity.
Cheers,
Spontanudity
"Forever Naked"
http://groups.msn.com/YoungSydneyNaturists
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Country: Australia
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Cheri
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/09/2003 : 10:24:21 AM
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Spontanudity, IF that was the case, she should talk with her husband in private. If it was that offensive to her, her husband should understand. There may be some underlying factors of which no one else would be aware.
Hugs, Cheri
Doing what I can to positively promote nudism
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Country: USA
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irishred
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/09/2003 : 10:31:51 AM
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Not knowing full story, probably best option would have been for wife to go into pool with bathing suit and the others if they so wished to swim in the nude. If wife was uncomfortable with that option, then all should defer to wife's wishes.
Red
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Country: USA
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FireProf
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 Posted - 11/10/2003 : 01:13:33 AM
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If we were invited to someone's home for a BBQ and swim and either of the homeowners/hosts objected to nude swimming, no matter how many people were in favor and what their significant other felt, we think you should honor the request not to be nude.
Then take the opportunity to sit and talk to the reluctant host, over dinner/lunch, about the joys, benefits and stress relief of nudism. Hopefully you'll convert another to our great way of life.
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Country: USA
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Kimberly
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/10/2003 : 02:39:40 AM
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Cheri and Irishred are right, the wife is the homemaker and the husband should have discussed this with her before. This put the wife in the position as being the spoil sport. I like your answer too FireProf, we should always be sensitive to other peoples feelings.
Kim =^.^=
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Country: Canada
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Spontanudity
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/10/2003 : 05:18:52 AM
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Of course, the other option is to offer the wife a few drinks... Its amazing how people get more comfortable with nudity after a few drinks. I remember when I was living in Queensland (Surfers Paradise), a group of friends (around 20 uni students) would go nightclubbing, then at about 2am we'd all have the nudie-swim call. All 20 of us would run at of the club down to the beach for a skinny-dip. Now those were the days. :)
Cheers,
Spontanudity
"Forever Naked"
http://groups.msn.com/YoungSydneyNaturists
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Country: Australia
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Bare in the Desert
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Posted - 11/11/2003 : 10:32:31 AM
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No, alcohol is not the answer. She may decide that she regrets what she did the next day and put some of that blame on her husband and/or the guests. Could lead to big trouble. If she feels uncomfortable around nudists its best to stay clothed since it is her house.
Just have a naked BBQ at your house the next weekend.
Dare to be Bare
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Country: USA
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Kimberly
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Posted - 11/12/2003 : 03:24:52 AM
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Your right about that Bare in the Desert, communication is the key.
Kim =^.^=
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Country: Canada
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johny59
Forum Member
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Posted - 11/12/2003 : 03:34:31 AM
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Somehow I have no experience with a wife indeed but in the touristic trips I have many times been initiator of nude swims, and allways some third comes out that says okay, third says it after week of think-over and third do allways dressed inspite of other do. Thats normal and noone had sayed she/he feels offended by those naked third flapping in the view. They sometimes laugh mildly or try to capture moments by camera, but I never felt a danger because of it.
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Edited by - johny59 on 11/12/2003 03:35:34 AM |
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Country: Latvia
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Skinny Dipping
